Who Says Cheaters Never Prosper?

A few weekends ago we popped over to Santa Cruz for the annual Olesen Family Reunion--this has to be one of my favorite times of the year. I love it almost as much as I love Christmas.

The first thing we always do when we pull into Santa Cruz, after unloading half of our belongings into our hotel room, is go for a stroll on the Boardwalk. We buy our season passes. We note changes that have been made on the Boardwalk. We measure Oscar and Olivia to note just in fact how slowly our children are growing because of the "Hernandez Mexican Midget Gene." (I mean seriously, I think my Great Grandmother who barely surpassed three feet tall is taking her vengeance out on my children.) This year we knew it was going to be a close one. The last time Oscar was measured he was 47.5 inches--with shoes, and he needed to be 48 inches to ride all except a couple of rides. For the past two years we have had to take Oscar down to the Boardwalk a day or two early to measure him and prepare him mentally for the rides that he can go on, and the rides that he may be able to look forward to next year. We thought that this would be the year.............

Not so much. So, we measured him, and saw that he just barely missed the mark, I mean, barely. We were crushed. Oscar was devastated. The tears commenced. Then, Grandma Kathie said, "I am going to CVS pharmacy and I am going to buy an orthotic or something that we can use to make him taller. We are going to try and fix this." Oscar's eyes lit up with hope. I inwardly prayed this scheme would pan out---is it bad to pray that your efforts to lie will prevail??? (I hope not). So, Grandma Kathie comes back to the hotel room with a pair of woman's flip flops and some duct tape. Jake then proceeds to cut, sculpt, and fashion custom wedges to place under the soles of Oscar's shoes. After the "lifts" were placed in the shoes we put them on Oscar and watched as has he miraculously grew before our eyes. We were ecstatic. But could he walk in them? Precariously so at first, but yes!

The following day we went back down to the Boardwalk when one of the rides with the 48" height requirement was open. We put Oscar in front of the measurement chart and:


(is it just me or does he have a look of devilishness on his face? ;))

Victory! He made it! So, we run to Double Shot--my personal Fear Factor--for the moment of truth. There are two measuring charts at this ride: one at the entrance to the line, and another one where the ride operator admits you into the ride. We measured him outside for good luck and he met the 48 inch requirement with flying colors. He runs to be admitted into the ride with Jake, and they ask to measure him again. Here is where things start to backfire and get ugly. The measuring chart at this particular ride is bolted into the ground to a metal plate. Usually when you measure someone you have them stand directly up against a flat surface so that you can get a proper reading. But, because there was a metal plate bolted into the ground next to the measuring chart, Oscar had to stand out in front of it and lean back to get measured. What happens when you lean back? You get shorter. From the side lines I was being that obnoxious mom saying that it wasn't fair for him to have to lean back to be measured because that makes him shorter, and if the man would just come out to the chart in front of the ride, where there was no metal plate bolted into the ground, he would see that Oscar was tall enough. The man said "no" and crushed my child's little heart and sent us along our way. The tears commenced again. After the tears were at bay we convinced Oscar to go on some other rides. Here he was admitted to ride on rides that he had previously had to go on with a chaperon, unchaperoned because he met the 48" requirement. This inconsistency in measurements irked me further and sent me to the ticket office to plead my case.

Normally I am not the type to do all of this confrontational stuff, I am all talk and never actually do anything about it, but not this time. I went to the ticket office and talked with them and showed him that he met the measurement requirements. She agreed that he did. She advised me to wait for this particular ride operator's shift to end and try again with someone else. Not even twenty minutes later I went back with Oscar and had the discussion with another ride operator and she let us measure Oscar out front where he met the height requirement. She said he was good to go. And I felt triumphant!!! Who says "cheaters never prosper?" (yes, I am a horrible horrible person. I lied. You may judge me.)




(Watching his feet dangle from this ride made me nervous that his shoes would come tumbling down, fall onto the ride platform, with the lifts tumbling out, and for our "cover" to be blown.....but they didn't. Phew.)

He wasn't questioned at all after this debacle, at this or any other ride; he sailed onto every ride without question and was SO happy.

I realize that this was quite the lengthy tale, but it had to be recorded for posterity's sake.

Anyways, this year at Santa Cruz we had a blast. It is fun to take in all of the sights. Although, I am finding more and more that I need to shield my childrens' eyes and sensor some of the characters that come barreling onto the Boardwalk. I think about 60% of the people on the Boardwalk are half naked and about 80% of things that come out of their mouths would land them a starring role on "Jersey Shore." Oscar kept asking, "Mom, what is she wearing?" My response: "You mean, what is she not wearing? Yes, it seems she forgot part of her bathing suit." His response: "Do I have to wear a shirt?" My response: "Yes Oscar, unless you are swimming, you need to be wearing a shirt." To all of the "snookis" on the Boardwalk I thank you for giving me countless opportunities to teach my children about manners and modesty. ;)


I was excited to have my new camera along with me this year. When you are taking a portraiture class and your assignment for the week is "photographing different age groups" a family reunion is the perfect venue. I took hundreds of pictures. I am still a little shy about my ventures in photography but I am getting better about putting myself out there. I won't show them all to you, but I will show you 34 of them, to be exact, of the sights and the people that we love when we go to Santa Cruz.




































The End.

P.S. We missed you Katie, Greg, Ella, and Natalie. It turned out to be the "year of the sand dollars," and we know that if anyone would have found them all it would have been you(Katie)--seriously you are the "Shell Whisperer." By the way, they are building the Monterey Bay National Marine Sanctuary Exploration Center across from the wharf and kitty corner to "Ideal." It looks like it will open in 2012. Yay! Maybe this will lure you into coming next year? Pretty please? :)